Veterans Day 2017

Veterans Day is a day that is huge in my family. My affiliation with the veterans that have touched my life include my husband who served 15 yrs in the Army. His grandfather who was in the Navy. My ex father in law (dec. 2000) was in the Navy. My ex brother in law was in the Army (we are still close). My son in law is currently serving in the Army. Both of his parents are Army veterans and his sister is currently serving in the Army, along with his uncle being an Army veteran. Along with these heroes, of course, I cant forget the MANY veterans in our military family...friends that have become family. This military community as a whole is one huge family. My best friends today are strong women who I met in "this life". If you havent lived it, you wouldnt understand that bonds and ties that bring us together. The most tight knit, courageous, brave group of women Ive ever come across.

My husband did 2 combat tours in Iraq. He was in Kosovo, Korea and Germany in addition to the many training months and schools in the states, away from home. This is the life we know. This is the life the girls were raised in. Its no surprise that my daughter married the son of 2 veterans and made the decision to enlist himself after they graduated high school. He is an amazing young man and an outstanding young Soldier who is fast tracking his way to a stellar career.

When I tell my husband "Happy Veterans Day", he hates it. He hates being thanked for his service. He honestly feels like he joined because his life was going nowhere in Maine. It was his only option, he felt. He did his job for 15 years and he ETSed (got out when his contract expired). Last night during our Facetime call, I said it to him...he had this look of "oh shut up" and made a joke out of it. That was concerning to me so I began a discussion about it. I told him he needed to reflect on his time in service as more than "just doing his job". Think of the experiences he's had, the bonds he's made. The brothers he gained. I explained to him why people thank him. He may see his enlistment as a do or die choice but others see it as a choice he made to fight for our country. Its bigger in other's eyes. However, sadly..TOO MANY veterans feel like my husband. It was their job, they shouldnt be thanked and they get very uncomfortable when people thank them. Ive had to tell my husband how to respond when someone thanks him ...simply say "Thank you for your support".

For me, I like to take today and make it a day of reflection. I think about those we lost that gave the ultimate sacrifice. I think about their families. I think about those that are still missing and never came home from previous wars long ago. I also reflect on our military life and how very grateful I am to have these people in my life today and what an honor it is to know these heroes. Ive seen what they go through, I know what makes them heroes. The ups and downs of serving this country. Most of our friends dont want thanks, they dont want recognition but they sure as hell deserve it and then some. Our children arent like "normal, civilian" kids. They are so resilient, courageous and strong is an understatement. Our kids were raised where its normal to have one parent gone a majority of the time and its not because he/she wants to but because its his/her job and his/her job is to serve this awesome country. They are raised with more pride than the usual little kid. Not every kid gets to say their daddy or mommy is an American Hero.

Last night, we were talking and I mentioned that Brandy isnt phased whether he is home or not. Not in a bad way. Just in a way that it is normal for her that hes not home consistently. I told him in her eyes, he's been leaving her since she was 4. I wasnt blaming him or saying it in a bad way. Just trying to explain where she is coming from. She's almost 18 now. He has been home for 70 days since October 2015. He deploys as a contractor now. He said that saying it like that was like "Whoaaa" to him. She doesnt resent him whatsoever. This is the norm for her and for us. But I sensed some guilt from his side. He doesnt tend to look at the big picture of any situation much so I point it out sometimes. The girls and I dont blame him at all for not being here. Instead, we are so grateful for the sacrifices he's made to fight for this country. The sacrifices hes made for our family to have a roof over our heads and food on our table. This is what WE signed up for when I signed that marriage certificate. Its not an easy road to go down at all but it is definitely worth it. 

My Soldier doesnt take pride in himself or his service. He is the most humble and downplayed Soldier I know. He never likes to make it known he was in. Before he got out, he despised wearing his uniform after work hours anywhere out in public. He refused to use his military ID to board flights earlier. He wasnt hiding his job, he just went out of his way to not make it known. He cringed when I would make him stand at sports events we went to that asked service members to stand and be recognized. He HATED doing that. So while he never had much pride for his service, the girls and I have plenty for him. He doesnt see the good in what hes done...like many veterans...but we do, the rest of the country does. The courage and sacrifice these men and women have made and continue to make is the most selfless thing a person can do.

So THANK YOU to all of those who have served or are currently serving our nation. You are HEROES in every sense of the word. I am thankful every day however today is the perfect day to make it known to any and everyone. Take today and let people appreciate you. Accept the love, the gratitude and even the free meals youll get today! You deserve this and more and you all will never be forgotten! To those that gave the ultimate sacrifice for this country, you will be remembered by this grateful nation and your memory will live on eternally.